Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Lesson 236 I rule my mind, which I alone must rule.

Lesson 236

I rule my mind, which I alone must rule.

I have a kingdom I must rule. At times, it does not seem I am its king at all. It seems to triumph over me, and tell me what to think, and what to do and feel. And yet it has been given me to serve whatever purpose I perceive in it. My mind can only serve. Today I give its service to the Holy Spirit to employ as He sees fit. I thus direct my mind, which I alone can rule. And thus I set it free to do the Will of God.

Father, my mind is open to Your Thoughts, and closed today to every thought but Yours. I rule my mind, and offer it to You. Accept my gift, for it is Yours to me.

The Following is Forwarded from

-Lesson 236
"I rule my mind, which I alone must rule."

At all times, my mind is serving either the ego or the Holy Spirit. It is helpful for me to recognize this as I go through my day. I can ask myself, "Which is my mind serving right now?" I only have right now, and which I serve right now brings me its effects.

The ego brings me experiences of individuality, separation and a world of trial and error. The Holy Spirit brings me the experience of peace, unity and service to the Sonship's recognition of the wholeness of God. Which will I serve today?

I make that decision minute by minute, whether I realize it or not. The more I truly desire to serve only the Holy Spirit and not the wishes of individuality, the more I will experience the Holy Spirit's innate joy, peace and universal Love. I start today with this one intent: That I keep my mind open to the Thoughts of God. As I truly open my mind with consistency to God, God will do the rest.

When I read "At times, I do not seem to be its king at all," I chuckled to myself. "At times" seems to be a grand understatement. But I appreciate Jesus kindness in giving me a goal to move toward. In fact, since I have been working with the Course, I can definitely see there has been progress in moving toward mastery of my mind. For that I am deeply grateful. But there is still much time when thoughts ricochet through my mind stirring up all kinds of havoc. And it doesn't seem like I have anything to do with where those thoughts come from.

Yet I do understand that they are there by my choice. I may have hidden the choice under layers of denial, but the choice is still mine. The good news about that is that since it was my choice, I am always free to make another choice.This lesson is encouraging me to make that other choice. It is also telling me that it is only I who can make that other choice. Nobody else can do that for me. Even God can't do it for me, for if He did, He would be teaching me that I am weak and at a lesser level than He. He will gladly and gratefully accept when I choose to give my mind to Him, but it remains my choice.

I also noticed that when it said as I give my mind to the Holy Spirit it is then free to do the Will of God, there was a little faint voice in the corner of my mind that was trying to convince me that this meant sacrifice. I would have to give up my independence and do the Will of God. Of course this voice ignores the fact offered in yesterday's lesson that God's Will for me is my happiness. It cannot be a sacrifice to turn my mind over to what alone can make me truly happy.

And so today I put a "closed" sign on the door of my mind to those thoughts of sacrifice and separation. And thus I open my mind to the joyous Will of God, that I may be filled with His Love and peace, which is also mine. It is His Thoughts of Love and unity that I now welcome. This is my choice today. That is how I rule my mind and keep it free to be as it was created to be.

I am being more aware of my thoughts and who they come from (God or ego). I am taking ego thoughts to Holy Spirit for healing more and more often and more quickly. I notice that where I used to enjoy wallowing in the emotional chaos they caused a bit before I gave them over, I am no longer seeing any advantage in doing that nor am I enjoying it. That is a very good thing and reassures me that I am, indeed, making spiritual progress in my life.

I get those little whispery voices, too. One that comes up as I congratulate myself for doing a good thing in quickly turning over ego thoughts is that now I am doing so good I will be tested. Something really challenging will come along to see if I am doing as good as I thought. The voice will come up with some pretty awful possibilities if I care to listen. I think that listening to that voice has kept me from moving forward in the past. I trust in God's Love more now, and am not so quick to listen to the whispery voices.

That voice is determined, though and sometimes speaks so quietly that I don't even realize it is happening. I think it must be subliminal. You know, like the rumor that used to float around about the movie theater people. The story is they would flash pictures of popcorn on the screen; they would do it so quickly that the conscious mind would not register them. But suddenly, you would feel the need to for a box of hot buttered popcorn. Well, I think that is what my ego does.

I was working on Pathways of Light Course 901: Introduction to Miracles Practice, yesterday but was distracted by a migraine and found it hard to fully focus. I wanted to put it aside and wait for the headache to go away, but more than that, I wanted to keep working. Especially since these migraines can last days at a time. I really didn't have time to wait it out.

Finally, I stopped to try to figure out why and how I brought this into my life. I swear I couldn't think of anything. Before I went to sleep, I asked for healing of whatever thoughts were causing the problem.

I dreamed about somebody giving me a monkey to take care of and about being busy and not having time to do it and not knowing what to feed it. I looked for a book and no one had the right book, though I knew there was one out there someplace. I thought about leaving the monkey with others to feed and take care of, at least while I slept, but then I worried they would not do their job. It was very frustrating and tiring. When I woke up, I couldn't get it off my mind.

Then I remembered a phrase from Course 901 that had caught my attention yesterday about a monkey mind. I went back to my course workbook and looked it up. It said, "They know that, with a little willingness to detach from the ego monkey mind, they will reach the Light of understanding that quietly and eternally resides in the mind."

I may not be completely aware of the deeply hidden thoughts that are keeping me from complete peace, but I feel certain that I am willing to detach and I trust Holy Spirit to help my unwillingness.

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